Shari was busy one night and Tom went to a party alone. It was stupid, but he started to make out with one of Shari’s friends there. Shari, of course, heard about it and had a dramatic confrontation with Tom.
“I never want to see you again,” se said. “I am so out of here.”
Tom’s devastated. He knows he was wrong, but he wants to know how to win ex girlfriend back. He misses Shari.
The first thing Tom needs to do is sincerely apologize. This is not just a quietly mumbled “I’m sorry” either. He needs to realize what he did wrong, figure out why he did it, decide whether he will ever do it again, and most importantly, communicate all of this honestly to Shari.
At this point, Tom should stop. The ball is now in Shari’s court.
Tom shouldn’t call Shari. He shouldn’t email, text, or comment on her wall. He shouldn’t send flowers or candy.
What he should do is let her make the next move. She is 100 percent in control here. If Tom goes out to score, he’s going to lose her. If he wants to know how to win ex girlfriend back, he needs to be planning for the next step not focusing on the present.
At some point, Shari will initiate contact. There are many pretexts for doing this. For instance, she may be mad and want to exchange all personal property. Or, she could be missing him and just want to talk.
At this point, Tom needs to make his move. He needs to show her that he’s the one.
He should put the incident behind him. Tom should only bring up what happened if she does first.
Otherwise, he should talk about the positive memories that they have had together. He should bring up specific incidents that were special for the two of them.
For instance, he could say, “I was walking around downtown and I saw the restaurant we went to on our first date and I thought of you.”
If he keeps it casual, he can talk about missing her. “I miss the way you laugh at my corny jokes,” is a good line. Telling her that he can’t imagine life without her is a bad one.
If she’s receptive, and she probably will be (why else is she calling?) Tom should suggest a casual get together. For instance, he should ask her to meet him for coffee or something similar. A half hour mini-date might get things back on track for them.
If he plays it right, he will have found the right solution to the how to win ex girlfriend back dilemma.
Get Her Back
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